This page is a light hearted summary of different types of Satanists. Here it models Satanists into four basic types: Evangelists, Infernals, Practicals and Diabolicists. People, especially Satanists, are notorious for not fitting very well into such boxes. So please bear in mind that no person fits entirely into one box below, and some people fit none of them. Some people, the true Demons, excel all all four categories! I am a whore of terminology so I enjoy classifying things even when it results in gross generalisations...
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Life is Satan's Inferno, Leviathan sized oceans of sexual expression.
Infernals are history's notorious Satanists. Surrounded by orgies, drugs, sex and infamy, these are the true Rock and Roll Satanists. These are lives lived to the full, burning the candle at both ends and setting the world alight with horror and uproar.
Infernals live the lifestyle. They are risk takers and pleasure seekers. Sometimes with dubious morals and short sighted fun, their parties have hit the history books of Satanism. They don't necessarily study Satanism, but their lives are proof that they understand every last letter of the word "indulgence" and that is about as Satanic as you can get if you care more for a full life than a long one.
Their credentials are unquestioned. Satanists give a nod to the Infernals whether they called themselves Satanists or not, sometimes with jealousy sometimes even with shock at their recklessness. If caught in an interview they're more likely to rant incoherently than actually enlighten the world... however their wanton desire for life is still inspirational and contagious even if it is slightly primitive.
2. Evangelists
Lucifer's Lawyers.
Presenting themselves as intellectuals and philosophers, web site authors (ahem...) and public figures, Evangelicals are critical thinkers and activists. Evangelists are sometimes inspirational and sometimes boring. They are sometimes Lucifer's elite intellectual underground, divining the wills of the demons. Evangelists are the Computer Keyboard Warriors.
I cannot help being critical of the Evangelists, as I find self-humour irresistible.
Evangelists sometimes struggle to justify and explain away the fuel burning frenzy of the Infernals. The Infernals do not care for the theory or philosophy of Satanism, they just want to have fun. Evangelists take pride and power in planning and thought, Infernals take enjoyment in physical gratification. Both are hedonistic, Infernals externally and evangelists internally.
Evangelists are saviours of Satanism, book writers and intelligent public speakers. The most popular members of the Priesthood of Mendes will be evangelists: Probably Infernals in their private time too, but hey the Priesthood are elected for their success.
Underground army of Belial.
Practicals sometimes frown upon the pointless meanderings of the evangelist. They share the point of view of the Infernals: Why bother justifying ourselves? Quit all that fussing over words and get on with your life already! Practicals also frown upon the hedonistic and reckless Infernals. What a waste of life! Like the Evangelicals, though, there is surely some envy in their criticism of the bold Infernals!
The Practicals are consistent, normal. They apply Satanism in their lives without burning out and without getting bogged down in details or philosophy. Just do it however you want. Ultimately sensible. "Sensible" coming from the mouth of a Satanic Evangelist type is a compliment. But the Infernals disagree, according to them sensible, like "political correctness", is just a boring waste of time and more of a restriction than a blessing!
"I am me first, a Satanist second. The way I believe all things in life should be approached"
TheOptimist 2001 Nov 09
The practicals may study Satanism privately and perform secret rituals. They toy with the idea of attending Grottos and meetings and may do, sometimes, but firstly they are themselves with their own lives. Sometimes mysterious, they can also be:
The Hidden Ones
The Practicals include the class of Satanist who are not public about their beliefs. Those Satanists who aligned themselves with the Church of Satan but do not tell their friends or relatives. It is personal. Their secret source of power needn't be discussed or debated, it just is. In my experience around London I've met a few Hidden Ones, they contact someone more Evangelical every now and then just as nod of mutual respect.
First-Level Satanists1
"Most of us will be what LaVey termed "First-level" Satanists; we appear to be akin to the rest of society, in terms of our jobs, outward appearances, homes and leisure interests - but we apply Satanism positively to give us that extra something we can't find anywhere else. And we use magic and ritual as we see fit" Dylan Clarke, "Store Cards - Prophets of the New Religion" Article published in Rule Satannia Issue 4, 2004
Oh, those pesky attention seeking types! But wait a minute, despite the inversion, parody, blasphemy and confrontationalism there really is a serious and deep intellectual message behind their actions. Many are not merely seeking attention to themselves, but to the ridiculousness of the concepts that they mock. They do not often achieve the same level of historical memorability as the Infernals, because the things that shock people change over time.
Taking symbolism from anywhere, from 666! to Pig's Blood, the Diabolicists are as hated as the Infernals by those America Christian anti-rock activists (you know who I mean).
They're as likely to irritate Satanists as anyone else, their arguments and apologetics are shoddy and immature and they're not entirely good at the whole "society" thing either. But out of this rebellious mess will eventually emerge a fully Demonic, mature person.
Diabolicists, in general, grow up to become Satanic Infernals, Satanic Practicals or maybe even Satanic Evangelists. Some drop all the imagery and become ordinary, sensible atheists.
Some actually never change, using their parody and the sense of outrage to send serious messages into society, to inspire the kids to question the taboos and to cause a stir in a way that the stoic Evangelists may fail to do. Sometimes shock factor just has no substitute!
Most Satanists are, of course, combinations of all the above elements to different extents. This text has been light hearted, but hopefully it still hints at some kind of underlying truth behind the different types of Satanists. And why different people put emphasis of different aspects of Satanism according to their own needs and wants in life.
Anton LaVey and other major Satanic figures appear to have very large doses of all the character types above. These super human demons are pretty damn unstoppable and they are generally given the respect and fear that they deserve by both the press, their fans and their enemies. Sometimes I will simply call powerful Satanists 'Demons'.
The author, is a mere Evangelist as is probably apparent by the unstoppable flow of words and web pages that materialize during those long weekday evenings. Any balloonist or Hell-lover will tell you that the point of hot air is to get you somewhere... so stop reading this page already and go party!
